OK, you want to tell your story… but where do you even start?
You’ve made the decision (or maybe just the almost-decision) to tell your story. You’ve lived a life full of twists and turns, heartbreak and grit, joy and healing. You know your story matters. But then… the big question hits:
“Where the hell do I start?”
You are not alone in asking that. It’s the most common thing I hear from women when they first reach out. Closely followed by:
“I don’t remember everything.”
“What if my life isn’t interesting enough?”
“Do I have to include that part?” (You know the one.)
But today, let’s just deal with the starting line. Because here’s the truth: there is no one right place to start. And that’s actually good news.
Start small. Start soft. Start where your memory takes you.
You don’t have to begin at birth. You don’t need a bullet-point timeline or a dramatic “once upon a time.” Some of the most powerful stories begin in the heart of a messy kitchen, on the edge of a hospital bed, or in the middle of nowhere on a Tuesday.
Here are a few easier ways in:
A turning point. Something shifted… maybe in a relationship, your health, your career, your faith. You remember that moment. That’s a start.
A person. Someone who shaped you for better or worse. Write to them. Or about them. Or around them, if you need to.
A lesson. Something you had to learn the hard way (and maybe still are.)
A place. A home. A country. A place you ran from, or toward.
Pick one. Jot a few thoughts. Speak it into your phone. Just begin.
You don’t need every detail. You need the feeling.
Memory is slippery. You might forget exact dates, dialogue, or what color sweater you were wearing. That’s okay. What matters more is what it meant to you.
Tell me how it felt. Tell me what changed. That’s where the magic is.
And no, you’re not “doing it wrong” if your first draft is disorganized, emotional, or full of curse words and scribbles. That’s what first drafts (and healing) often look like.
Still stuck? Try talking instead of writing.
Writing can feel intimidating. Staring at a blinking cursor doesn’t exactly coax deep reflection. But conversation? That’s different. Because it’s human.
That’s also what I do.
When I work with a client, we don’t sit down with a structured interview and a stopwatch. We talk. I ask questions. You remember things. We laugh. We pause. Sometimes we cry. But almost always, the story starts to reveal itself.
You don’t have to figure it all out today. Just begin.
That little voice telling you, “You should write your story someday”? That voice is your intuition. It’s not going anywhere. And it’s usually right. So, if you're sitting with the question, “Where do I even begin?” maybe today, the answer is simple:
Begin right where you are.
And if you’d like a little help getting started, I created a free guide called Gathering the Threads: How to Start Remembering (and Organizing) the Stories of Your Life.
It’s full of gentle prompts and simple steps to help you jog your memory and begin shaping your story. No pressure, no perfection required. Because your story matters. And so do you.
